You could get “smart flood detectors” cheap on amazon that use smart life. They make a sound (not the loudest tbf) and trigger notifications on your phone via the app.

Maybe not the greatest for privacy but might start the trail…

To be honest it wouldn’t even let me download it off a vpn, on a different OS that hadn’t connected to a vpn, or in a different browser.

Had to find somewhere other than the Microsoft site to get one.

+1. People often don’t realise they can just try it on a usb stick (and often easily install alongside windows osx)!

Exactly! It’s more “Help me help you” than anything nefarious.