Iron Lynx

My observation is that when push comes to shove, the one good at a thing absolutely cocks it, only for the worst at the thing to catch it in the best way possible.

DM: Decipher this thing. Roll for int.
WIZARD: 3… that makes 7…
BARBARIAN: 19, that makes 17…
WIZARD: ಠ⁠ಗ⁠ಠ
DM: ಠ⁠‿⁠ಠ

Perhaps a good DM or table could create good narrative spins for this…

sneaky edit: replaced [lenny face]s with relevant emotes

Let’s see. One of my campaigns we have:

• A Dhampir Paladin whose surname is Van Helsing, who fights enemies by trying to suck their blood
• A Death domain Cleric, who’s OOC made it very clear that they’re gonna go into necromancy
• An Eldritch Knight fighter
• A Firbolg druid with 1 level in Rogue who took that level so she has access to weapon mastery (we started at level 4)
• Me, a Battle Master fighter.

I swear, I think I’m gonna prep a Drow Assassin Rogue as a backup character.

(NINJA) EDIT: Y’know, I’m gonna prep the sheet already, just in case.

BARBARIAN: *slams fists on bar* I WANNA SMASH THE BARKEEPER!

BARD: *leans flirtatiously on the bar* I want to smash the barkeeper 😏

Took me a little while to see. Had to open both in new browser tabs and quickly flash between them to see the difference.

Fun story, when I started playing my Tabaxi Cleric of Sylvanus, we were walking through the woods towards our first dungeon, and on the way we got ambushed by wolves. The talk went:

ME: I’ll position myself between the others and the wolves.
DM: then they’ll attack you first.
ME: pfft, that’s fine, I’ve got an AC of 18.
DM: does a 21 hit?
ME: 😨 (meekly) yes…?
DM: 23 hits as well…
ME: 😰
DM: and 19 as well, right… You take 10 damage.
ME: fuck, I’m down!

Grog and his dynamics with Pike, and/or the mere existence of Jester Lavorre, makes that categorically false. Way more shenanigans & tomfoolery than the earlier comment was asking for.

One of my DMs is my gf. So I think that if I were to cause such a situation, it might play out something like:

ME: I go look for a brothel.
DM/GF: Sure, you do that. Now, what’s everyone else up to?
ME: that’s fine, we can play it out later 😏

Improvise, adapt, overcum.

Homestuck? In 2024?

It’s a tough Bill to swallow.

Because Bill fights back.

Only if the casters are part of the group that’s being repeatedly wed. If the casters are all external, it’s +2n AC.

Does it stack though? If n people cast ceremony on a party, does that mean they get +2n AC?

EDIT: I read the rules. And completely read over the latter part of your comment. “A creature can benefit from this rite again only if widowed.” 😢

Ours.

Turns out the only fire damage we had in our stash was an enchanted dagger.

In retrospect, I should have asked for incendiary ammunition. Among the five of us, we had at least three with guns. Or taken a bit of gas for our car to turn into Molotov cocktails. Ah well, it was a oneshot that happened more than a year ago.

In a oneshot of Monster Of The Week:

“Did The Organisation^TM supply us with a flamethrower?”

Oh god he just jumped in!

I saw an opportunity and I took it!

He’s hopeless, he’s lost.

But don’t stick your dick in crazy!

Cyanide! Don’t stick your dick in crazy!

Don’t care. My sheets have all the measurements without major mechanical significance listed in SI units. Length of hempen rope? 15 metres. Darkvision range? 18 metres. Character weight? Kilograms. The only imperial unit I keep using is speed (ft/turn)